Wednesday, July 21, 2021


A man goes to visit a psychiatrist, and after a little while the psychiatrist decided to give him a Rorschach test; showing the patient a series of ink blots and asking what he sees in each of them. The patient looks at the first one. "That's a woman on her knees, blowing two guys." He looks at the second. "That's two couples, each having sex in the wheelbarrow position." He looks at the third. "That's five guys in a daisy chain, jerking each other off."

The psychiatrist puts the cards down. "It's obvious to me," he says, " that you have something of a dirty mind."

The patient frowns. "I've got a dirty mind? Come on, doc, you're the one with a drawer full of dirty pictures!"

I was reminded of this little joke when chatting with my friend Julie, of the newly rechristened Strict Julie Spanked! blog. I value our friendship a lot, but we met through unusual circumstances (I commented on her blog with some of the things I would do with her if she were my sub, she told me how gushy her little pussy was getting thinking about it) and our relationship goes through unusual cycles. Specifically, if I go too long without trying to make her knickers fizz then she'll try and provoke me, a little like an infant testing the patience of her caregiver, seeing if they'll carry on allowing the naughty behaviour or if they'll take the child over their knee for a spanking. Once Julie's been put back in her place we're firm friends for a couple of months.

I noticed a couple of these little provocations recently, though maybe I'm reading too much into it? Well, tough luck if I am, Ms Delmar, as you're getting a healthy dose of humiliation regardless!

I should preface this by saying that way back in March Julie posted a story I had written for her on her site, and made a big show explaining exactly how theatrically she had masturbated to it behind her husband's back. I posted my own blog stating that this bragging about cumming to my writing behind David's back seemed sketchy, and if she was going to use me as a secret source of real world pleasure then she should balance the scales with some real world punishment too. Only fair, right?

I knew I was flying close to the Sun, I have no real authority over Julie, and the obvious moral thing would be to confess to her husband exactly what she'd been up to and let him handle it. Still, at this point everyone was acting on the assumption that David doesn't ever read Julie's blog, and it was certainly fun pretending to take her in hand in his absence.

Well, at first she was gung ho to prove that she could take the punishment I'd prescribed for her, but I wasn't surprised when it never actually happened, and eventually she acted as if no deal had been made. Well, no harm, no foul, I never reached out to Julie expecting to have any physical influence over her or to find out about her personal life. The fact she'd decided to cum reading my stuff was amazing all by itself. However, I was a little irked by this little exchange we recently had in the comment section of her blog:

Me: I've just noticed you called me your god friend! I wonder what Dr Freud would say about that! You are absolutely **not** allowed to correct it! ✌

Her: Ohhhhh!

Maybe it's like a God Father. You must now see, as my God Friend, to my moral upbringing.

Me: I think I tried that a couple of times, to minimal results! You realised I have no real power over you, and missed out on a lot of fun! 😜✌

The job sounds like hard work, you're a good person with a big heart but, to paraphrase your post, you're a stubborn little fuck when you want to be! Never dull, though!

Her: "Stubborn" is my super power 😊

Okay, so maybe she had forgotten about our little arrangement in the heat following some ill-thought-out comments she made on an earlier post, and then paid the price for! When I reminded her of my attempt to "see to her moral upbringing" and how dismally I'd failed she brushed it off. Fine. But then she had the audacity to post a blog entry named "Cornertime Pics" that was breathtakingly audacious.

Skipping back to our exchange in March: Julie had read my blog and written a nice lengthy e-mail, starting by suggesting we were "virtual fuck buddies!" She then followed it with this one-liner, dripping in disrespect:

Oh, and I'm supposed to ask you about a punishment?

Well, with that attitude I decided to skip over any thoughts of leniency - reading up on her most recent punishment it doesn't seem to have sunk in that taking her punishments with decorum may earn her a little clemency! I wrote back as follows:

I think you deserve a little punishment, yes.

I think the next time you know your husband is going to be away for a while you should send me a quick email to let me know your punishment is starting. You should spend forty minutes in time-out with your nose against the wall and your arms by your side, one of your dildoes in each hand. Your bare bottom should be on display for the empty room. You can set an alarm for forty minutes to let you know when you're done, and you can spend that time thinking about how bad a spanking you need to administer yourself, now we know you are capable of doing so. You know your limits and what a proper punishment feels like, so you can judge this for yourself.

One you've come out of the corner and given yourself a quick spanking you can e-mail me to let me know you're done and I can give you a couple of quick questions about your punishment so I can gauge how contrite I think you are. I have a notifier set up so I always know when I'm getting e-mails, and I can prioritise your punishment over whatever else I might have going on so David doesn't have to find out, since you kept your pleasure-making a secret from him too.

I think this is firm but fair, and well within your limits. I was obviously playing it up a bit on my blog, but I do feel a little bit uneasy knowing you went to such great lengths to try and impress me, and this will let me know that you genuinely care about my feelings rather than just using me as an excuse to indulge your exhibitionist streak.

I'm aware you have your safewords, and there's nothing to stop you from telling me to fuck off and get over myself, but I have a feeling you'll rise to my challenge.

Let me know if this is acceptable to you, and I'll get to work on that story I thought up as a reward.

What Julie didn't know at the time, and will only find out when reading this, was that I was intending to ask her if she was still horny upon completion of her punishment, and would have told her to rub one out if she was. I'm all heart, that's my problem! As embarrassing as corner time is for her, I thought it would be even worse doing it for nobody's benefit, dildo in each hand, bottom pointed at nobody in particular! I was glad to see she was taking me more seriously when she wrote back:

FORTY FUCKING MINUTES???? Are you FUCKING insanse???? I don't think I've ever really done more than 10 minutes of timeout (I might have exaggerated a bit for my blog...).

yes sir... it might take a while until I have that much alone time again, what with COVID and all still on. But i will do it (forty FUCKING minutes...)

Ha ha ha! Looks like I'd scored a direct hit! They say when punishing a bratty child with a time out you should give them one minute per year old they are... Seems it works for forty year old troublemakers just as well as five year old ones! Well, like I said, I'm a big softie, so we had the following exchange:

You certainly have exaggerated a bit for your blog, I thought I was letting you off a little easy! You can yellow out a little if you're going to be a big baby about it, but then I'll be expecting a very severe self-spanking, including with the Muskoka paddle you used to pleasure yourself with; and I'm sure that your husband will notice your sore little bottom if that happens. Plus, though I won't share the specifics of your punishment, I'll have to let my readers know that my first punishment was too much for you, and that I had to let you plea down, and I know you don't like people seeing you tap out...

I'll let you decide, but I'm delighted you're taking this seriously.

A big virtual hug for my favourite sub,


Respectfully, but Fuck you, Sir. I'm doing the full 40!

That's my girl! Let's call it forty-one, though, to discourage you from swearing at me.

Phew! Was expecting to have to wash my mouth out with soap for that. 1 minute extra  only. Got off easy!

And that's basically where we left it. I sent her monthly "reminders" that she got less and less interested in. When I warned her I was thinking of spilling the beans about the whole sordid affair and letting my faithful Functionistas know what a big 'fraidy-cat wimp she turned out to be then she wrote me the following:I

I guess my reluctance is more that I feel being put in the corner is a prerogative reserved for my husband, as punishment. Somehow, for me, more intimate than being fucked for fun, you know?

Maybe if you take this angle, explaining my reluctance, it would be ok to give me a well-deserved tease.

Very convenient that she's found a moral philosophy that allows her to be "fucked for fun" and to diddle herself stupid with no comeuppance, elaborately and without her husband's knowledge, but to shy away from making it right! Consider that me administering a "well-deserved tease," and know that I hope she has enjoyed this trip down memory lane.

But why share this now? Well, like I said, not only has she suggested I take a firmer hand in her moral upbringing, but her Cornertime Pics post was ridiculous! In it she had reposted 48 pictures uploaded to another blog, seemingly without any formal consent from those photographed (you'd have thought she'd be more careful after her run in with Miss Chris!) Under each picture she'd written a caption explaining a feeling the picture evoked in her or the larger scene she imagined playing out. She specifically asked readers to pick out their favourites and comment saying why, so I did. I also clarified that one model was not holding something between her thighs as suggested:

33, 25 & 47... You can imagine 47 with her laptop or tablet letting her blog readers know how naughty she's been!

Nothing between 32's thighs, the care instructions are hanging off the back of her panties, has this tripped you up? Don't tell me you cut the care tickets off your garments, I'll have to think of a fitting punishment for you, on behalf of your local dry cleaner!

Laughing at the timings you've prescribed for these poor girls, knowing they would probably break you!

I was more than a little surprised by her response:

25 looks like a British girl. 33 and 47 are being humiliated just like you like them to be. And I'll defer to your expertise on 32, that's a big tag!

Oh I know re the timings. Especially the poor teen I had in the corner all day long.

Let me be perfectly clear as to what had just happened: This bitch had found a site that posts nothing but pictures of adult women experiencing corner time, signed up to it, stolen nearly fifty pictures, uploaded them all to her blog, captioned each and every one, and now she has the nerve to kink-shame me?! Aren't they all being humiliated? Isn't that why your pussy got all tingly staring at them, imagining what could be happening behind the scenes? Sorry doc, but you're the one with the dirty pictures!

I knew this aggression could not stand, and that I would have to embarrass her appropriately once I was in the right mindset. I think I've probably done a good job. Feel free to give her some (harmless, good-natured) razzing in the comments!

And it's absolutely the manufacturer's care label. Maybe they just run smaller in Canada!



  1. I thought Julie gave you a very nice compliment in her previous comment:
    "you are more than capable of giving remote women orgasms"
    But Julie is always both candid and ironic (or ironic and candid?): She once explained what she was doing in this blog with her readers.
    What reader does not dream of entering into her reality, but few risks it.
    Without going as far as your magnificent scenarios, I had asked her once to think of me when her husband was deep inside her, and when I asked her if she had done it she replied "Ah! So there was a witness? " or something like that...
    Not in the mood to destroy.

    1. Oh, when she's good, she's very, very good, but when she's bad... 'Strict' doesn't begin to cover it!

      I imagine all sorts of weird and wonderful things happen in that beautifully warped mind when she and David are getting down and dirty... It wouldn't surprise me in the least if one of your salacious comments were occupying her mental bandwidth mid-coitus!

  2. Oh dear.. well... just... BLUSH! It's all true.

    For the official record, the longest I've ever been in the corner is 30 minutes, but more commonly it's 5 or 10 just to centre me pre and/or post spanking.

    And, honestly, 30 minutes is EXCRUTIATING and there is no way I'm going to get through 41 (and especially not holding 2 dildi), so yeah, I talk big, but deep down I'm a little pussy (I am).

    If my husband sentenced me to 41 minutes I would stamp my foot and tell him TOO LONG! I would do that even knowing the likely effect would be a lengthy trip across his knee followed by 60 minutes of corner time, which I would then have to get through, somehow.

    But, as I say, it's a particular intimacy reserved for my husband. I conceptualize the ability to punish me as THE most intimate thing in my life. I would do 40 minutes, or 41, or 60, or all day in the corner, to keep that intimacy alive.

    So I think it is appropriate for me to apologize to my good chum Mr. Tankerton Latch. I'm sorry, Sir.

    1. So weird to me that this is the part of the punishment you have a hard time with - I'd take it all day over some of the other punishments you've advocated for! Maybe it's because time moves slower in this part of the world - a common phrase here is "I'll get to it dreckly," i.e. in my own time but you're top of my list!

      Love you imagining your adorable little tantrum and resulting punishment!

      No real need to apologise, you are obviously forgiven, and I hope you enjoyed this very public jaunt down memory lane! When I see you blushing like that I know it's not just your face getting hot!

    2. Yes, I have this particular perversion that being humiliated in certain ways in certain situations dampens my pussy. It's something a vanilla could never get, "oh, you want me to humiliate you? Ok, you're a fat ugly pig, turned on yet???"

    3. I'm well aware, I was just saying I hope your initial "BLUSH" meant you enjoyed reading it, especially in your nether regions!

    4. Yes... that's implicit in "BLUSH" ;-)

    5. Bwah hah hah! I assumed so, but if anyone reading wants to keep score...

      Thank you both for commenting, I needed the pick-me-up today!

  3. my pleasure to be the third wheel :)

    1. No way, man, I don't get enough visitors to play favourites! Your insight is always welcome here.

  4. When I'm tired of looking at Julie's voluptuous ass, offered by her husband, on her site, I go to yours to revel in those of her avatar. Busy days!
    How are things at your place ?

    1. The last couple of days have been okay. Expect a checking in later that features a truly Kafkaesque experience!


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